13/02/2010 by stupidgirl_no1.

Or should that be blogged too soon?

So I though we’d got the hang of breastfeeding at last.  Turns out he was sucking rather than latching (and yes there is a difference, who’d have thought?).  He is fine and still well fed but I am now in lots of pain.  I kept thinking it was just due to the change from using breast shields but it has got to such a level that I now admit - we can’t breastfeed “properly”.  Ah well, back to breast shields.

So now I’m quite disappointed in myself, all over again.  I just want to be as perfect a Mum to him, as he is a son to me.  I guess I just have to be satisfied that I am managing to breastfeed at all, some ladies can’t.  Tomorrow he turns 17 weeks and we are into the zone of “you can start weaning now if you like but its best to wait until he’s 6 months”.  Goodness knows I am looking forward to this whole fiasco being over, will be so much easier when he’s on Sugar Puffs and burgers!!

In the meantime I must share this video that is just adorable.  It was what I was woken up by this morning but is still cute, I’m sure you’ll agree…

If it doesn’t work here just go to my flickr page to see it.

Posted in Baby!, body issues | 2 Comments »

11/02/2010 by stupidgirl_no1.

…to paraphrase Professor Higgins in My Fair Lady.

To what do I refer?  Well I’m afraid this is where I started talking about my boobs again!  If you were brave enough to read my blog entry about breastfeeding you will know that Owen and I were not managing to proceed in the traditional manner.  We have been using breast shields, which works fine but you do get some leakage and you need to sterilise them in between every feed. 

Well, at the weekend, during one of his feeds, I glanced down at one point and there was Owen feeding, and there beside him was the shield!  I did a double take, then checked that I could feel milk leaving me, and sure enough he really was feeding without a shield!

Trying not to get too excited prematurely I squealed at Bryan.  Anyway the next couple of feeds he would knock off the shield now and then, until now I don’t even get the shield out, I just sit down with Owen and away he goes!

I’m still trying not to get excited and think we’ll never need a shield again but I had such lovely supportive comments from various people after my main blog on the topic that I just had to share my glee - and here’s hoping it lasts!  Of course this Sunday he will be 17 weeks old, which is the minimum age for weaning, so not much longer that he’ll be feeding!  I will try to hold out for the recommended 6 months exclusively on milk, but it depends if he gets super hungry before that and needs more.  At least when I’m weaning him off brest milk onto formula it won’t be a new thing as he had formula for the first four weeks or so until we got established feeding.

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31/01/2010 by stupidgirl_no1.

Well I just realised that at 2.50pm today Owen turned 15 - weeks obviously!  Hard to believe he’s been ours for that long but then at the same time I am now feeling a bit more confident as this Mummy-ing thing!  There have been quite a few “first”s since my last post - his first wee chuckle, first (and second the next day!) time going to a birthday party, first go on a bouncy castle, first attendance at a wee person’s music group, first trip to town shopping, first feed in public, first afternoon with his four cousins, first swing ride in a park, first look at a book and his first turning of a page himself.  The last thing obviously made his Librarian Mummy very proud!

Meanwhile I’ve had my first night out with a whole glass of wine, and another night I had my first beer since June 2008 when I gave up drinking and we started trying for a baby.  This is all due to the wonder of Owen now having his own bedtime.  I feed him at 7.30 and then we put him to bed and he tends to be asleep by 8.30 or 9 at the latest, so we have some time to ourselves.  He sleeps until at least 3 as a rule so its safe for me to have a wee drinkie once he goes to bed - woohoo!  The night I was out at Gill’s I was enjoying myself chatting to the girls so much that I didn’t get home until about 2am - and then Owen was awake an hour later!  That was hard, but worth it!  Nice to have some grown up chat for a change.

As for weight, Owen is now healthily over 15lbs and filling his 3-6 month clothes nicely.  On our shopping trip I chose him two outfits which are the first clothes I’ve chosen myself!  Everything else he’s worn has been hand downs or gifts - well except for the Manchester United clothes and the Mamas and Papas jacket that Daddy chose!  I am down to 10 stone 11 so only half a stone to loose before I get back to my pre pregnant weight - hurrah!  I’ve already past my pre trying weight as I was about 11 stone when we decided to try for a baby, got down to 10 stone 4 before I got pregnant and put on 3 stone!

Owen can now support his own head so we can now put him in his Bumbo seat, or the in door bouncer.  Its lovely that he can sit up supported and play with toys and as he can now grasp things he is enjoying playing with things - everything fascinates him and needs inspected.  It’s so cute watching him with new things, or with his favourite talking Winnie The Pooh teddy which he just loves.

As I reported with his hip he now only wears his splint at night so that’s lovely as we get much nicer cuddles during the day, much closer!  His blocked tear duct seems to have cleared up so we’re not having to clean it and cream it twice a day, the down side is that when he cries we get real tears - which makes Mummy’s heart ache!!  We’ve still not managed to breast feed the “normal” way but we’re still happy using the breast shields, it doesn’t bother me anymore, I’ve just accepted that we use them and that’s that.  It does mean I’m constantly sterilising them and the machine is constantly on but such is life!  I also can’t just be lazy and stay in bed to feed him during the night, we have to come downstairs and get a shield from the steriliser - and it does leak sometimes so we couldn’t feed in bed anyway.  Never mind, small price to pay and it means I get to check email, Facebook and Twitter whilst the wee one fills his boots!  This is also why it was a big thing for me to finally feed in public, its a bit difficult to be as discrete when using shields, but it is possible!

At Lucas’ birthday party our wee guy started crying quite a lot and we were thinking he was teething but he’s only had a couple of crying bouts in total so I think it may have been his colic, or just that he was too warm or something.  Sometimes it’s hard to tell with babies.  He does like to chew or suck things but then babies like to investigate things in their mouths so it might not mean he’s teething - that will come soon enough I’m sure!

And that, I think, is that!

Posted in Baby!, body issues, Trips out, General waffle | 1 Comment »

13/01/2010 by stupidgirl_no1.

Today we were at the hip specialist for a follow up appointment following the original ultrascan appointment and resulting return visit.  He is making good progress although not fully “fixed” quite yet.  So now he only has to wear his splint overnight and we can leave it in the nursery all day every day!  Hurrah!  We have another appointment mid April to check up on it and hopefully that will be our last.

It’s weird, I’d got used to holding him with the splint so he’s now less rigid - and I can’t hold him by his groin anymore!!  The splint was like a little baby holder so you could just hold it - and it kept him straight when feeding - its like I need to learn to hold him all over again!

He was just starting to get the hang of sitting upright, with assistance, so will need to relearn that as well I think.  But in the meantime he’s just enjoying kicking his legs freely!

 If the video isn’t working you can see it here, on Flickr.

To follow on from my last blog post, he continued to sleep through the night for almost a week but the last 2 nights has woken up hungry about 5am.  Not too bad, at least I’m getting a 5 or 6 hour stint of sleep and then going back to bed.  He is a good boy in so many ways!

Our snow is melting so we can start planning some trips out of the house, I think we’ll try a shopping trip in town next week with the pram.  Then in February we’re hoping to go stay with my parents for a few days whilst their hotel is closed and they can spend quality time with their grandson.  Plus Bryan can have some peaceful Man time - or maybe not peaceful as I think he’s planning a gaming weekend with some mates!  I’ll appreciate a change of scene anyway, much as I love my house!

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07/01/2010 by stupidgirl_no1.

So last night Owen and I slept for 9 hours!  I think that’s the first unbroken night’s sleep I’ve had since I got pregnant.  It was wonderful and lovely - and very clever for a 10.5 week old baby!

Today we went to the doctor for Owen to get weighed (and to get some more free drugs for us both!).  He now weighs 14 pounds 10 and a half (6640 grammes).  No wonder I hurt my back when bathing him yesterday!  As we have some snow I took him in his sling rather than try and push a pram so my back was quite sore by the time I got home too - even though we cheated and took the bus both ways - well there was a blizzard on the way home so I thought it best.

There was a lady in the waiting room with 6 month old twin boys, apparently they don’t take naps at the same time but if one starts crying they both go - and they are too big to both get a cuddle at the same time.  Yikes!  Poor lady!  I shall think of her when Owen is crying or not sleeping and be glad there’s only one of him!

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06/01/2010 by stupidgirl_no1.

Nope, haven’t blogged for a while, again, sorry!  Don’t know what I fill my days with…. Oh yeah, there’s a baby in the house!!

So Owen was born and loads of people very kindly sent lovely presents - actually various Twitter friends sent presents before he even got here.  Then it was Christmas and the tree at ours had tons of pressies for him under it, then Boxing Day we went to my parents’ for lunch and there was another tree load for him there!  The following day Bryan’s Dad came for dinner with even more presents. 

But now its boring old January so the excitement should be over, right?  Wrong!

As I mentioned before we did the nursery with a Little Mermaid theme when we decorated it in November 2008 but if we had a boy, which obviously we have had, we would change it to Finding Nemo or Pirates of the Carribean.  So I have been working at changing it over, ready for him moving in there when he’s 6 months old and too old to sleep in his moses basket by our bed any more.  Granny and Grandad Gunn bought him Finding Nemo curtains and a lightshade for Christmas to help with this.  Also I had some frames made up, for some of the Nemo posters we had in the attic from Bryan’s time at the Disney store, to match the nursery furniture. 

Anyway I mentioned on Twitter that I was needing a name plaque for his door so Sianz one of my wonderfully artistic friends there offered to make him one.  I had no idea what she was going to make as much of her art I’ve been admiring is done on post it notes.  Well yesterday the ARTwork turned up in the post and as you can see it is most fabulous!

Owen gives his first object d’art a critical look and shows off that he can now grasp things

The funny thing was that once Bryan got home he turned it upside down, unable to contain himself any longer.  You see OWEN upside down is NEMO.  You’d think we had planned that, being quite major Disney lovers and all that….  Not sure how long ago it occurred to Bryan but he was waiting for me to notice.  I’m a bit slow apparently!

Anyway getting that present reminded Owen about Santa and his reindeer and how he brings lots of presents.  So he donned a present he hadn’t had the chance to wear at Christmas (as it was waiting at my parents house so we didn’t get it until Boxing Day and then I insisted on washing it before he was allowed to wear it as all good Mummies apparently do).  He argued that there is still snow so there is still a chance that Santa and his sleigh are still doing the rounds, and he’s just too cute to argue with.  So here is him sleeping hopefully in his Rudolph babygrow (thanks Lindsey!)…

It turns out that baby knows best as low and behold the postman brought another parcel for him this morning!  I got very excited on seeing it was from the lovely lady who made my wedding dress…many years ago!  She had already sent us one of her special cushions which is in pride of place in his nursery but this is a special personalised baby cushion, which he loves as you can see…

Whilst I’m here I should give an update on the wee guy’s progress.  He is now 10 weeks old and growing steadily.  Last night he did the most awesome thing of sleeping from 11pm to 9am - so long I had to get up and express milk part way through!!  So nice to get a decent sleep though, especially for Bryan as he has that work thing that I’ve heard some people do (maternity leave and smug non working due to end 15th June).

As well as the gorgeous smiles you can see demonstrated above he and Mummy play the sticking our tongue out at each other game.  He also sometimes “talks”, which I’ve been trying to catch on film but its quite hard..

He is getting to grips with grasping things (couldn’t resist the pun, sorry!) and when grasping a finger from each of Daddy’s hands in each of his hands he can actually sit up!  Not for very long but he does really pull himself, even though he’s still wearing his splint.  As for that, well as I reported his next appointment is coming up and hopefully after that he’ll only need to wear it overnight. And soon this whole thing should be over!

As for us, well we’re fine, thanks for asking!  Its a steep learning curve being parents with lots of new things to cope with all the time, but I think we’re doing okay.  I put on 3 stone being pregnant but only have 9.5 pounds left to loose.  All my maternity clothes have been bagged up ready for giving back, passing on etc.  And no, I don’t need to keep them for “the next one” as we are more than happy with what we’ve got thank you very much.

As well as seeing family at Christmas we spent Hogmanay with Ray, Nicole and Lucas.  It was lovely to say goodbye all together to the year both couples became families.  The boys came out of their beds briefly at midnight (not that Owen woke up!) and we had a group hug, which was very special.  We didn’t get a photo of all of us together but did get family shots.

Bryan has some new camera equipment to play with - his Christmas present to himself.  As its for doing portraits and Owen hasn’t fully mastered posing yet, I have to “model” for him but he has taken some lovely photos as a result.
 

As with all my photos in this blog post you can click on this photo to get to our Flickr pages and see other photos, Bryan’s Flickr posts go for quality rather than quantity whereas I like to chronicle Owen’s development, even if my photos and videos aren’t very professional looking!  I may not blog regularly but I do post photos on my Flickr so interested people can see Owen grow up!

We have of course got some snow and so I will leave you with this pic I took before it got so deep, and frozen.

Posted in Baby!, body issues, General waffle | 1 Comment »

16/12/2009 by stupidgirl_no1.

Today Owen had his check up with the hip specialist to see how his under developed hip is doing.  He’s been wearing a splint for about 3 weeks now but we were given no indication when he got it about how long he would need it.

So he got x-rayed and then we were in to see the specialist.  She is very pleased with his progress in such a short period of time.  Apparently with the kind of splint he has its a minimum of 6 weeks wearing it full time and then it goes onto just overnight wearing of it.  She has given us an appointment for 4 weeks time and hopes that after that appointment he won’t need it full time anymore.  Here’s hoping!

I have to say, he was a wee gem again.  There’s lots of poking, prodding and pulling happening to him at the moment and he takes it all quite happily.  Today he was smiling at me as the lady put cold gel on him for the ultrasound and he just stared up at me as the hip lady manipulated his legs to test them out.  Such a good boy, I’m so proud of him.

Posted in Baby!, body issues | 3 Comments »

16/12/2009 by stupidgirl_no1.

Forgot to mention in yesterday’s post that Owen is now into size 3 nappies.  I also just checked the weights in his 0-3 month clothes as some of them seemed a bit tight and sure enough I need to move him into the 3-6 month clothes now so will have to change his wardrobe over. 

They grow up so fast!

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15/12/2009 by stupidgirl_no1.

Today Owen had his 8 week doctor’s appointment.  Until now its been midwives and health visitors but this is the big check up and his first vaccinations - I was dreading it.  However the wee guy was just super.  He is doing really well and passed all the tests and hardly cried when he got his jags, which was great as I’ve been in the waiting room listening to the building being cried down by other babies!  He even smiled when the doctor made a joke, bless him!

His weight obcessed Mum obviously needs to report on his weight!  When he was born he was 8 pounds 15 and 3 quarters (4080 grammes), he then lost weight (as do all babies) but was quite slow putting it back on.  We had various initial feeding issues, as you may have read in my last post.  Anyway last time he was weighed he was back onto the same graph line, or centile, as he was born on and he is still on it now at 13 pounds 6 (6085 grammes).  So that’s super and exciting for us!

His length has gone from 51 cm at birth to 60 and a quarter cm today and his head circumference has gone from 38 cm to 42 cm, this latter is staying on the same graph line as well.

Owen has had a blocked eye duct since he was born and even though I clean it regularly and put breastmilk in it (full of antibodies apparently) it hasn’t cleared up yet.  So the doctor gave us some drops to put in it so hopefully they will help.

He also gave me a prescription for sugar free paracetamol (like Calpol) as Owen may be a bit feverish tonight after his jags.  Last week Owen was diagnosed as having colic so he also has some Colief to help that.  Yes, I am most grateful that children do not pay for their prescriptions!

In other medical news, the wee guy is currently wearing a splint.  The day after he was born it looked like he had a “clicky” left hip so we were given an appointment for an x-ray 6 weeks later in case it was not just an effect of being born, as is often the case.  When we went for the x-ray they found that his right hip was under developed.  Where he should have a big ball joint in a bowl, he has a wee ball on a plate.  Good description and diagram here.  The 2 aspects have to rub against each other to stimulate each other’s development and so the splint is designed to do this.  Luckily its been found at an early stage so it should be fairly easy to fix it as his whole body is still in a developmental mode.  He doesn’t seem at all bothered by the splint either as he’s too small to realise there’s anything wrong.

Last week he went to his first formal meal, my work’s Christmas Library Lunch.  He was a total angel, despite being passed around lots of other guests for cuddles.  His colic issues mean he has wind and likes to be upright so I did have to spend most of the meal holding him on my lap but luckily I’m good at doing things with one hand now!

I also went to my work’s Annual Dinner last month.  Yes, I left the house for a whole evening and Bryan managed really well on his own with Owen - with the help of a bottle of expressed milk of course!  It was so nice to wear a dress, some make up and spend an evening talking to adults.  It was very kind of work to include me on the guest list even though I’m on maternity leave.

In non baby news, we got a new shed as the roof of our old one rotted and fell in.  Our car also failed its MOT and it turned out there was a recall on it so its been in the garage for the last 2 weeks, at least its under warrenty!  And we’ve had the chance to try out a Suzuki Splash as the garage is away up in Peterhead and they had to give us a courtesy car in the meantime.  Our rocking chair also collasped so we replaced it with a “nursing chair and footstool” that swivels and glides back and forward.  Bryan is looking forward to renaming it “xbox chair” once I finish feeding Owen!  Oh yes, and that’s me back to the baby. 

Well he is the centre of my world.

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02/12/2009 by stupidgirl_no1.

Okay, so I’ve mentioned having problems with feeding before but not gone into much detail - this is the detail, hence the Too Much Information warning!  I wasn’t going to eleborate but was asked to write it up for an academic study so thought I might as well include it here too in case anyone is interested.

Here goes -

When Owen was born, six weeks ago, I remembered being told at breastfeeding class that it was beneficial to feed in the first hour.  As we’d been left alone in the labour ward I thought I’d give it a try, and was thrilled when it worked.  However once we got to the ward I couldn’t get him to latch again, even with help from the midwives.

The next morning I’d still not fed him so a midwife expressed my milk and fed Owen with a syringe.  This was the start of a frustrating battle, with neither of us really knowing what we were doing. 

We did manage to feed a couple of times and we were sent home feeling fairly confident.  However when the midwife came to the house she realised his weight was not going up.  It hadn’t fallen past the allowed 10% but wasn’t rising.  As a new first time Mum this was devastating, I wanted to be a good Mum and wanted to do what was right but it just wasn’t working.  Owen was too hungry to sleep and too tired, through lack of energy, to feed.  He would also get really excited or agitated when put near my breast and toss his head about – none of the babies in class had done that, they’d all opened their mouths and latched perfectly.  We were trapped; and I was getting so exhausted that it was affecting my milk production, which hadn’t had a chance to even get established.  I was told to get formula into him immediately or he’d need to be readmitted to hospital.  It would also take the pressure of feeding him off me and relieve the anguish so that hopefully I could express milk for future feeds.  So began another tiring cycle of expressing and cup feeding, a process that took about 90 mins, and would need started every 3 hours.  At least the wee guy would sleep now though, especially as we’d give him formula last thing.

That first weekend my midwife was on holiday so I saw 4 different ladies, each with their own (often contradicting) ideas and suggestions to get him feeding.  One suggested breast shields, wee silicon gadgets for ladies with cracked nipples so the baby wasn’t feeding direct.  Fortunately these worked first time!  The next 2 feeds Owen latched and fed properly and I was thrilled and excited.  Then he got lazy again and wouldn’t latch, but would still use the shields.

So I kept trying but he wasn’t keen, I’ve only had him latch a couple of times since.  However the important thing is that he’s gaining weight, sleeping, and keeping happy.  Shields may not be the “proper” way but they work for us so that’s all that matters.  We do often leak some during feeds so need to use a cloth and sometimes still end up with me having a wet waistband on my jeans and him having wet sleeves.  I doubt I’ll ever feed in public but I can express for trips out and give him a bottle, now he’s old enough to not have to be cup fed!  My milk is so well established that he only occasionally gets formula now, just nights when he’s having a growth spurt and feeding every 2 hours as we both need more sleep than the hour you snatch between feeds.

That’s “how its been going”, as for “what has been helpful” – well the support of my husband, Mum and friends have been the main thing.  It’s amazing once you mention having problems just how many other people have had too.  Before I had Owen I thought it was a natural and easy thing to do – well I’ve seen various ladies doing it effortlessly in public and that’s how it looked in the class too.  There was mention of the possibility of mastitis or cracked nipples so I was prepared for those but I really wish they had pointed out that it can be hard to get established.  I realise that the main battle is to get women to want to breastfeed but I would think that those who go to a breastfeeding class have already made that decision so why not be honest and up front with them so they can mentally prepare themselves?  The worst part, for me, was feeling like a total failure and utterly useless – I didn’t know this was actually quite “normal” and a lot of women have problems to begin with – it didn’t mean I was a bad Mum.

But I’ve drifted to “what was difficult”.  Back to helpful – my husband was the one that was there encouraging me and trying to help with positioning.  He also kept me well fed with lovely nutritious food so I had the energy to go on.  The midwives were all helpful, although it was confusing with them all suggesting different things, and some were disapproving of other’s suggestions.  I also attended a breastfeeding clinic at the hospital with a midwife and an NCT councillor which gave us several new suggestions to try, and let me see there were other Mums struggling too.  I had to demonstrate us trying to feed and it wasn’t helpful when the midwife watched Owen tossing his head about in front of my breast, then laughed and said “yes I see your problem.”  He can’t have been the first baby ever to do this!  It was one of my friends who actually made the straightforward suggestion of holding his head still as I put him to the breast.  That helped, a bit.

The most helpful thing was my final acceptance that breast shields worked for us and that I don’t care if some people don’t approve.  Hopefully at tomorrow’s weigh in Owen’s weight will be back up to the centile line it was at when he was born.  That is all that matters in the end.

Posted in Baby!, Rants, body issues | 4 Comments »