Archive for August, 2010

Togetherness is a wonderful thing

Thursday, August 26th, 2010

So this morning I watched Bryan get a vasectomy.  I was planning on sitting in the waiting room and doing the dutiful wife thing of driving him home but then the doctor said “come on in, its a once in a lifetime opportunity” and it seemed rude not to go.  I did check with Bryan that he was okay about it, and I did stay at the head end – same as he did at the birth!  Still saw quite a lot though, most interesting!  Togetherness is a wonderful thing.

I did manage to resist saying “sucks to be you” as the doctor went snip snip.  This is one of the helpful things Bryan said to me after about 2 hours of trying to push our big baby out, so it seemed only fair to say it to him.  My time might come now the anesthetic has worn off of course.  And we both knew I was thinking it – in a caring way obviously!

It was really rather interesting watching them at work, I don’t like blood and stuff but coped quite well – and Bryan was a Big Brave Boy and coped very well.  Considering I just had to sit on a stool it was quite nice of him to check if I was feeling faint at all part way through!

Anyway that’s that done.  I did drive him home afterwards, stopping off at Asda for a ton of painkillers and a Kinder Egg.  That’ll take care of him.  The nurse told us that Bryan shouldn’t bounce Owen on his knee for the next couple of days, and the doctor added that no one should bounce on his knee tonight, so I will be in charge of Owen for a wee while – at least I have the car today so can drive him home instead of having to try and amuse him on the bus, much easier!

I just phoned Bryan to check how he’s getting on and he’s lying on the sofa playing PS3 or XBox so I think he’s going to make it through today.

What a relief I feel though.  I know you have to wait till its confirmed that its worked and stuff but just knowing that we’re nearer to being safe and sound is a lovely feeling.  Felt quite bad when I was grinning estatically when we popped by his work to collect the laptop so he could work from home if needed.  I have been stressing about getting pregnant again though, just can’t face it all again.  And Owen is such a perfect little boy I couldn’t want for more even if I tried.  I love my family, just the way it is.  Togetherness is a wonderful thing.
Happy family!

Secret no more

Thursday, August 12th, 2010

As you will know if you read my blog much, I don’t keep things secret much.  Only when there’s a really good reason – or of course if its someone else’s secret that isn’t mine to tell.  Anyway there’s something I’ve not blogged about and for ages we didn’t tell anyone but now I’m fed up of trying to remember who I’ve told and not told.  Also, I’m past being upset by talking about it and I don’t see the point in keeping it to ourselves anymore.

So I’m gonna tell you and then its done.  I don’t need responses or replies, I just need to unleash the secret so its not weighing on my mind anymore and making me feel guilty I haven’t told people.  Especially my Twitter friends who have been so fab and wonderful over the past couple of years since I met them.

Its not a nice or happy secret, so if you’re reading in great intregue or excitement, please stop now.  Its just one of those things that happen and it happened to us and at the time we couldn’t tell folk.

Anyway here it is – I was actually pregnant 3 times. 

Some people asked why we were taking so long getting pregnant – well we weren’t, we just didn’t manage to hold onto the first 2.  We lost both little beans about the 7 or 8 week point so they had not yet become much more than the size of a bean.  The first time I think my body just didn’t know what to do, the second time I think I got pregnant far too fast after the first time (when I asked the doctor when we should start again after the first one his answer was “when you get home”). 

The second time it happened Bryan and I looked at each other and declared “third time lucky”.  We then enjoyed Christmas and New Year before trying again.  Owen is our third time lucky baby and the moment I saw him I knew everything before had happened for the perfect reason of bringing the wonder of him into our lives.  I will never forget those 2 little ones I never got to meet but I will also never regret that Owen was the one that stuck in there!

Anyway I won’t go into details of what happened and how and when and stuff.  If anyone wants to ask me about it I really don’t mind, miscarriage is a statistically common thing in the first 12 weeks which we had been warned about by a kind friend.  But that’s why I was so happy when I finally got to tell people!  It also explains the hidden bit behind this blog post.  We’d had about 26 weeks of pregnancy before we could tell anyone that we were 12 weeks pregnant.  And that’s part of why Owen will be an only child.  We can’t go through all that again, I’m just so glad I had Bryan beside me all the way through, he was amazing.  I’m so lucky to have him and Owen and I’ll never forget that.

So there you go, secret no more.